Unsaid Feelings

by - Thursday, May 09, 2013

May 8.

It’s been 2 months, 4 weeks and 2 days since you left. How are you? Are you doing fine? I didn't ask you this in person or through text ‘cause I know that I should just continue moving on. I deleted your number on my phone, again ‘cause I’ll just keep on texting you if I didn't  It’s a great idea though. I’m also having troubles in sleeping this past few days (fyi) I keep on thinking about some things. Some of them are about you, how you left me, how you didn’t explain why and why leave all of a sudden. I have so many questions to ask you but I don’t have the guts to ask. I can see that your life is ok now so I guess if I asked you the questions that are running through my head, it wouldn't change a thing about us. I must admit that I’m still wasting my time wondering, what if it didn’t happen? The “leaving me” part. Oh fuck it’s happening again. Ok stop. I just want to know the real reason why you left. I didn’t believe you when you said “kasi yun yung tama”. It’s hunting me dude! So please, just say it -_-

I’m tired of waking up everyday feeling hopeless, that I’ll never get over you. Realizing that I should have been much  better.  I’m tired of convincing myself that I should forget you, be happy and just enjoy life. But guess what, I can’t. I’m the kind of girl that treasures every moment that I have with my special someone. Maybe that’s why?

You’re the only guy that made me feel that I’m special, makes me smile whenever I’m in a bad mood, talks with me on the phone even if it’s already late, still laughs whenever my jokes are corny, replying to my texts when you have classes, and many more. You’re not just any guy ok, you’re the guy that Shauna Lacson “loved” and “adored”.  We both had our mistakes, we chose wrong decisions and some other stuff. And in the future I will just laugh it all out, for sure. I will surely miss the good-sweet- happy-weird- bipolar times we  had *thumbs up*  the next girl you’re going to be with is going to be lucky having you. And the next thing you know.. I’m happy too! Yey. Haha.

[late blog]
[last blog about him]

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